My 5 month plan!

Yes ladies and gents, I'm setting out a new plan!

It dawned on me today that if I am going to make Slimming World work for me, I will need willpower. If I have the willpower to make that work, then surely I have the willpower to succeed without SW?!

I have 5 months until our week in Italy, which would definitely be a better trip if I was in better shape - just remembering how tiring it was walking around in 30 degree heat the last time is exhausting! 

So, my goal is to drop 3 dress sizes and increase my fitness levels in 5 months.

My plan to achieve this is pretty simple:

• Cut refined foods and eat more whole foods
• Walk 30 minutes 3 days / week building up to 6 days / week
• Stretching 5 minutes morning and night daily
• Drink more water 

Granted, it is going to take a LOT of organisation and a LOT of willpower, but it's going to be so definitely worth it!

Measurements Day #2

I was supposed to measure myself yesterday but I woke up with a terribly sore stomach which stayed with me all day and I didn't even remember about this until 5pm, when I wasn't at home. I forgot first thing this morning too, so I have done these measurements after I have eaten, which is not ideal for the weight reading, but here are the results compared to the first ones last month. 

Bust: March = 44" April = 45.5"

Waist: March = 42" April = 42"

Hips: March = 53" April = 52.75"

Weight: March = 17st 3lbs April = 17st 8lbs

My conclusion is that I have gained weight (though probably not as much as 5lbs) and it is all in my bust area! I am quite happy with that because that is the area I find it easiest to lose from, so it could have been a lot worse!

I expected to have a gain this month, as I have been comfort eating to ridiculous proportions since my Nana passed away last month. I still miss her and I guess I always will do, but I have to find some inner strength and get myself back on track. 

Unfortunately, the idea of getting Slimming World vouchers from my Dr didn't work out - apparently it was a pilot scheme and has stopped! It might come back, but I can't really wait for that. I'm hoping hubby will agree that I can try it for 12 weeks anyway - there is a discount for paying up front and initial membership is half price at the moment. Fingers crossed for me guys!!

Michelle x

Easter...

The Easter weekend was a strange experience for me this year. Most years hubby and I spend it at my parents’ house – it has a sense of occasion about it there and we get some form of gift and a cooked dinner, having had fish and avoided meat on Good Friday. 

This year, because of the mess up with our flights and the chance to change them at no extra cost, we decided to move them to the May Bank Holiday weekend, so that I could attend my brother’s 30th birthday party (shhh it’s a surprise!). I am delighted that I am getting to do this, but my Easter suffered greatly. 

Good Friday I wasn’t feeling that great, so avoiding meat turned out to be quite easy. I didn’t however have any fish either. Ah well. 

Easter Sunday we got up and headed to the in laws for the Liverpool match at noon. I was glad to have that to focus on and not be left moping about the house. However, once the match was over, listening to hubby and his Dad squabbling was too much for me and I took a walk to the Co op in the hope that (a) it would be open and (b) I might get a reduced price Easter egg, as I had not received any! I was 50% successful in that it was open, but there were no reduced eggs to be found. I got a couple of things, including reduced fat hot cross buns! – wandering round the store gave me chance to compose myself and relax. I walked back to the in laws’ and managed to keep my composure for the rest of the day, despite having Chinese take away for dinner because his Mum had been out in the afternoon and it was too late for her to start cooking when she got home. 

Easter Monday I was a bit more chilled out. I worked on the appearance of my blog for a while and learnt a few things along the way. Lovely friend C was a great help, as her blog is a piece of art :D I am not happy with mine yet, but I’ll keep tinkering about with it and I will settle on something eventually! 

The other thing I was drawn to on Monday was diets. As avid followers will know, I am always coming up with new ideas of how to lose weight and then not sticking to them, so I decided that I need some structure rather than free styling and failing. I found something online called Dietchef, which involved paying for a month’s worth of meals to be delivered which could be stored in a cupboard and microwaved. At first sight this seemed to be just what I needed to teach me about portion control and take away the daily dilemma of what to eat. So I started to read reviews on it and ask if anyone on Twitter had heard of it. Then I realised that you still have to add your own fresh fruit and veg, as well as rice in some meals. Not only was this additional cost, but it was also not helping with my portion sizes issue! 

As a result of bringing this up on Twitter, lovely friend H started to talk about Slimming World, of which she is a member. I explained that hubby was not very supportive because he likes to share take aways, etc, but she was able to persuade me that there are dishes I can go for within the plan, as long as I am smart about it. The great thing about SW is that it is possible to get free classes via your GP – father in law got them last year but didn’t really take to it. So I have agreed with hubby that if I can get the vouchers, I am going to start the classes. I don’t know if it is 6 weeks or 12 weeks that I will get, but I’ll say to hub that if I can lose 7lbs or 1 stone (depending how long the vouchers are for), I want to continue the class and pay for it myself. Seems reasonable to me! 

So, I am going to the Drs tomorrow morning and will hopefully get the SW sorted whilst I am there. I am actually quite excited! I am hoping that there are approachable people there and they are not all gabbling in heavy Belfast accents! This could not only change my life weight-wise, but also give me a social life! What’s even better is that the meeting is in a church (Elim Pentecostal), so I can be closer to God without the headache that I would get if I wanted to go to an actual service. I think it is important to have him near me if I am going to succeed on this journey. Who knows, maybe I will eventually gain the confidence to say, “I want to go to church!” if I like the feel of the place! It is only 0.5 miles from our house too – half as far as I used to walk to church before I moved here. 

Sorry, I am going off on a tangent here, but just lately I have started to think that not having the church in my life could be a major part of my issues. It is crazy how we can fall in love with completely the wrong person for the lifestyle we want – I never dreamt I would marry an atheist who doesn’t dance!! Anyway, I may come back to that topic at some point in the future. 

The reason I am going to the Drs tomorrow rather than some more convenient time is that I have been feeling light headed in the afternoons the last while. When I say light headed, I feel like I am walking on a boat! I suspect it is related to my blood pressure levels but I’m not going to risk it any longer and will see what the Dr says. I am going to see the new Dr, so I will have to have my wits about me to work out quickly what type of Dr he is and how I should approach the SW thing. I do hope I don’t mess it up! I’m not sure how I could though, since my BMI is in the top range at present (different charts label it differently, but something along the lines of severely obese). About my BP though, I changed to taking the tablets in the morning rather than at night a few weeks back, so I expect he will just tell me to move back to taking them at nights. We’ll see though! 

All in all, despite being emotional and "character building", the long weekend has been very productive for me and hopefully has set me on course to achieving my goals :)

Michelle x

Where do I go from here?

Despite my last post being so positive, I'm sorry to say that I haven't been feeling that great this last while. 

It's easy to say that I am still grieving after the passing of my Nana in March. I'm sure there is an element of that involved, but I'm not going to say it's 100% down to that. 

Since I failed to get the job I applied for in work, I've found it difficult to feel as settled in my current job. I just had myself too geared up for moving on and really want to move on now! I have, however, come around to the idea that it would be fine to stay within my current team, for a number of reasons. Firstly, I've got great hours and as flexible a working pattern as I could hope to get. Secondly, I love being the Stationery Officer and I wouldn't be guaranteed to do that in another team. Thirdly, using the same payroll system as I currently use would give me a better starting point in a new post. 

So basically, I just want to move on to a different client's payroll. We have a new client going live in July. I'd love to be involved with that, because there would be no precedent to work to and I could put my own stamp on how we deal with them admin-wise. 

I have a meeting with my manager (step up the ladder from my team leader) on 30th April and I am hoping that this will give me the opportunity to ask about moving. I was going to send an email to my team leader about it, but then I realised that in person I can better gauge the situation and make sure that I'm not burning any bridges or anything. 

Hopefully sorting out my work situation will help me to feel better in myself. For a few months work has been the only thing I felt confident about, so losing that feeling has left me feeling lost with regards to my purpose in life. 

I also need to sort out my health. For the last couple of weeks, I've felt dizzy quite frequently and also had particularly aching muscles. I was wondering if the dizziness was my blood pressure increasing despite my medication, so I am trying to cut down on my salt intake - crisps had become a regular part of my diet recently, which was never a good move! 

The muscle thing, I don't really have an explanation for. All I can do is try to start doing stretching exercises as well as walking more often. Eventually I would love to start yoga or pilates, but as with everything, I'm taking small steps. 

This blog is a bit of a jumble, but it is helping me to make sense of how I feel and where I go from here to feel better. 

• Job
• Diet
• Exercise
• Positive thinking

Simple, right?

Michelle x

Ten of My Good Points

So, ever influenced in life by those around me, after reading my friend Pearl's blog about 20 of her good points I decided to write this blog about my own good points. I'm sticking to ten points though!

1. My brilliant blue eyes - they shine so beautifully when it's sunny or I'm particularly happy!
2. My smile - I remember being told on several occasions on nights out that I should smile more because it suits me. I agree with this notion, but you have to earn it ;)
3. My loyalty - I'm very much a home bird and couldn't be without my family and close friends. Living away from my family has been a steep learning curve which still continues even now. My loyalty goes on regardless of proximity though. 
4. My sense of humour - it can be quite wicked at times, but if you "get" it, you'll probably like it!
5. My ability to always see good in people - I mean always! Some would call it nieveity, I'd just call it having a good heart :)
6. My intelligence - ok, so I'm not Oxbridge material and I am useless at retaining general facts, but what I know, I know well and I didn't get my degree in Business & Quality Management just for looking pretty ;)
7. My feminine form - ok, it's somewhat out of shape right now, but when I'm in form, I love my curvy shape!
8. My romantic view of the world - not always practical, but it helps me sleep at night and gives me hope for a better future for everyone :)
9. My open-mindedness - despite my sheltered childhood, I try my best to never discriminate against any type of person because I do not like to feel discriminated against myself.
10. My love of colour - as tempting as it is to hide in black every day, I can't help but be attracted to colourful clothes and accessories, which I think brightens life up for everyone around me :)

That's me - feel free to have a go at writing your own list! ;)

Michelle x

De-cluttering - for real this time!

As I mentioned in my recent blog one of the things I want to address during BST this year is getting our house in shape. 

A brief background to this is, we've been paying rent on the house we used to live in for 17 months so far since we moved out, purely because we have not addressed the terrible amount of clutter and got the house emptied yet!

Recent events surrounding hubby's working conditions have highlighted that we need to act quickly and get rid of this noose from around our neck. Hubby is concerned that he cannot continue to work in that company for much longer because he is not receiving the support he needs from his manager or indeed his colleagues to some extent. I did a very quick summation and worked out that if I returned to full time hours and we got rid of the rented house, we could survive on my wage. This is a scary prospect, but if it has to be done, then I'll do it. Every year around this time is just the same and I'm always scared of what it will do to our relationship (7 years ago it broke us up for a year). So, if it gets hubby away from that ridiculous working environment, I'll step up to the plate!

So anyway, today I am sitting here at the rented house feeling overwhelmed! I know what I want to do but I don't know where to start or where to find the energy to start!

Hubby and I have agreed that we need to be ruthless. Previously, we had the idea of moving things into storage to allow us to vacate the house and then filter through things at a more reasonable pace. Now we have agreed that this is not a good idea. We need to just get rid of things now, because we are not going to visit a storage unit, based on experience! Besides which, if we haven't used things in 17 months, we probably don't need them!

I have to completely buy into this approach, but I am scared about doing so. Just sitting here today, I realised that I have hoarded things because they relate to better times in the past. I need to let go of those "things" and create new better times! 

A major thing for me is clothes. As many of you know, weight gain has been the bane of my life for many years. I have a suitcase here of clothes ranging over 5 different sizes. They are mostly new, that I thought I would "fit into soon", but never did. I feel quite nauseous about the idea of parting with this suitcase.  In fact, I'm not even sure that I can do it. If I can cut down a lot of other things (how many fleeces does one couple need??), it won't be too conspicuous.... *looks sheepish*

The other thing of course, is handbags! I had already cut down what I was going to keep but now I think I will have to be even more ruthless. Let's face it, there is little point in me having a dozen "going out" bags when I don't even go out!! :-( 

The next thing will be kitchen utensils. We have far more things than any normal household would ever use, let alone us two! We have to keep things simple and realistic. As with everything else, we can only keep what we can store away. There is no point having a worktop full of gadgets if there is no space to actually use them! 

The idea of having a streamlined household is so liberating, but it will take commitment. 

Writing this blog has really helped me to focus my mind and know what I am doing this afternoon. Arrivederci, clothes & handbags!!

Michelle x