Work is going great this week – my new Payroll Controller hasn’t really started on my client yet so I’ve been working under my own steam, which I am used to from when I’ve been covering leave, so it’s been ok in the most part. I also chaired the client conference call for the first time yesterday and that went well, so I got a real buzz J Another good thing about it was that we had no errors that were our fault in June, even though my Payroll Controller was 2/3s into his new client’s work for most of the month, so that reflected really well on me to management here. :D
Today I did something really stupid and unproductive though. I was online looking for an address for client’s Finance Dept and the jobs tab caught my eye. I then, in my infinite wisdom, decided to do a national job search for “admin”. It was amazing how many NHS jobs there are at the moment, definitely worth looking at if you have admin skills! Then the thing I was looking for but didn’t really want to find was there in front of me. This job:
http://www.jobs.nhs.uk/xi/vacancy/0a6408043ed614263b18076a3998aa5f/?vac_ref=913430811
Please check the link before continuing to read, or this won’t make a lot of sense!
I should point out here that ESR is basically my bread & butter. There is little in my job that I can do without using it. This has been the case for over 4 years.
I would absolutely LOVE to live in York, because I think it is a beautiful, larger version of my home town (they both have a minster and cobbled streets). Willerby is pretty nice too, but doesn’t have the best public transport links to my home town. I had a temp job there once and had to wait an hour after finishing for the bus home (which itself took almost an hour!)!
Of course, on that salary in that geographical area, I could easily afford a wee car so that wouldn’t be an issue.
Anyway, my point is this. Just when things are going so great for me (because they are, all things considered) I do something stupid like this that makes me hanker for being back home! I actually feel like crying as I type this, because it’s such a perfect opportunity that I cannot possibly avail of!
My lifestyle is very simple and transferable – work, eat, sleep, holiday, visit family – so that’s not even the issue. The issue is that I am not free to do as I please. I am not “I” but half of “we”. Please believe me when I say, I absolutely do not wish to be anything else other than that. The problem is, the other half of “we” has never lived anywhere else but here. He is very close to his parents & we see them several times a week as well as him phoning them most days whether one party is on holiday or not. He has worked his way up in this company to the reasonable salary that he is currently on. His qualifications stopped at A Levels. What I’m saying is, even if he took the plunge and said, “yeah we can move over there” (extremely unlikely!), he would really struggle to get a job!
My heart is breaking here. I’ve rarely been so tempted to swear as right now when I ask myself why I did this search! (those that know me well will know that I never, ever swear).
Why, why, why, why, oh why did I do this???!!!! :’(
